Marriage, Divorce, & Remarriage

By Ron Adema,  Pastor of Doctrinal Studies Bible Church




Jane and I have been married since 1959 and here we are almost 50 years later and into the 21st Century.  Our marriage has survived cultural changes from “Ozzie and Harriet” to the “Osborne's” and the “Simpson's.”  We met and married in a culture that believed in marriage “until death do us part.” This was a culture that taught couples to stay together and to work through the stress and strains of normal life problems.








In this culture we had role models that embraced this thinking and taught it in the church and to our families.  Today the attitude seems to be – “until one of us becomes unhappy.” A few years into our marriage, Jane and I began to pursue the answers to marital problems by studying what the Bible had to say about marriage and then applying it to our marriage.  It didn’t change the normal stress and strain of life, but it did change our way of dealing with the stress and strain and with each other.

Early lessons in my life

Let me give you one example that comes to mind about how Bible teaching changed our way of dealing with problems.  We were struggling with finances and time management and being married with two children and going to college and working and all the things that go along with marriage.  I was offered a great traveling job, which was a wonderful opportunity for my career and our finances.  However, it kept me away from home and from involvement in rearing our children, which eventually grew from two to four.

During one of my Bible studies on marriage, family, and rearing children, I became convicted regarding my limited involvement as a husband and father and Christian role model.  I was overwhelmed with the need to be a part of my children’s early development as people.  (You can read what we discovered in another booklet entitled “Parenting” on our website at

After much prayer and discussion, Jane and I agreed that it would be better for us as a family for me to become a full-time husband and father.  What happened from that day until now is an unbelievable story of our marriage, family and ministry.

These are the words that still burn in my soul:

“What would it profit me as a father, if I gained the whole world and lost my own family?”

I placed myself into Mark 8:36-37 and the story of Noah: “God did not spare the ancient world, but preserved Noah, a preacher of righteousness, with SEVEN OTHERS (his family), when He brought a flood upon the world of the ungodly” (my emphasis added) (2 Peter 2:5).

Jane and I have written this booklet to help you through the different stages of marriage difficulties with Biblical answers.  It was also written to point out common conflicts with the hope that you will be encouraged to seek spiritual and marital counsel rather than throw away your marriage or marital happiness. It is our prayer that it will be as helpful to you and your marriage and family as it has been to ours.

Prior to studying each lesson

Before studying each of these eight chapters, it is important to evaluate your spiritual relationship with the Lord Jesus Christ. Your spiritual relationship is the key to the study and application of these Biblical principles to your marriage.

As you work your way through this booklet, you will be given the opportunity to prepare yourself at the beginning of each lesson by reading 2 Timothy 3:16-17, John 16:13 and 1 John 1:9. Understand that personal sin hinders the teaching ministry of the indwelling Holy Spirit (1 Cor.6:19-20). Therefore I encourage you to begin each study with confession of sin and with prayer..

Series on Marriage: Pastor Ron Adema
audio 1
audio 2
audio 3
audio 4

Marriage Conference 2014: Associate Pastor, Al Rosenblum
session 1, notes
session 2, notes
session 3, notes

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Next Chapter:

The Origins of Marriage